Before You Say I Do
Planning a wedding can be an exciting as well as a frustrating event. There are so many decisions to make and details to attend to. Preparing for this event can take months and has a tendency to consume just about every aspect of your life until the big day. Unfortunately, during this time, couples forget to cover some topics that will affect you into your married life. Following are a few areas that you should discuss with your future spouse before walking down the aisle:
Who Washes and Who Dries
Unless you have been living together, you will need to have a discussion about household duties. If you do not have this discussion, you are opening the beginning of your marriage to confusion, arguments, and possibly contempt. Talk to your future life partner and ask them what chores they like/don’t mind doing and what they absolutely loathe and then decide on who will do what and what will be shared. Being able to come home from your honeymoon and know exactly who will do the laundry and who will do the grocery shopping will help you to get on your way to a well oiled machine.
The Holiday Tug of War
Do not wait until the first holiday to figure out which side of the family you will be spending it with. Understand that you will have to compromise in order to try to fit everything and everyone in. Talk with your fiancé to find out what traditions their family has and share what your family’s traditions are so that making the decision can be a little easier. You may want to start your own traditions as a new couple, which you will then need to explain what you are doing to each side of the family so as to prepare them properly.
Growing the Family
Most likely you have already discussed whether or not you will be having children and how many, which is an important factor when creating a life together. The discussion does need to go a little further though. Talk with them about what kind of discipline you believe in, how you want to educate your children, what faith they will be taught, what values you would like to institute in them, and so on. Remember that you and your fiancé were raised in two completely different atmospheres and there will be things that you want to use when parenting as well as things that you want to steer clear of; just make sure that your partner feels the same. If you two disagree on issues, talking early will help the two of you to find common ground.
Sharing the Finances
When the two of you become one on your wedding day, that also includes your financial situation. Know what you are getting into before you make it legally binding. You should sit down with your future companion and share everything that has to do with money. Pull your credit reports, bank statements, investment statements, and anything else that has to do with finances. If there are issues, discuss how those issues will be rectified and decide if that needs to be done before marriage or not. Once you have had full disclosure, then you will need to decide if your money will be community or individual. After that has been established, it would be prudent to create a budget so that you are both on the same page when it comes to your finances.
Making sure that your marriage is strong will start well before you exchange vows. Dig as deep as you can into what makes each of you who you are so that you can establish a strong foundation in which to build upon. The more you know ahead of time will help to alleviate some of the bumps in the road that will surly occur.
Stephen Minton is a freelance blogger for prenuptialagreements.org and strongly recommends seriously considering getting a Premarital Agreement before you make your vows.
Comments are closed.